Songs for Spashley
by bduefbfsy
Summary: I've decided to take lyrics from songs and apply them to Spashley scenarios. I will return to THE DEAL. I just wanted to start something new. I will update this story occasionally. For those of you who know this song. You know what happens.
1. Chapter 1

**I, I'm driving black on black  
Just got my license back**

Ashley pushed harder on the pedal at her feet, lurching the car into a faster speed. Feeling her body slam back into the seat behind her she gave a wicked dark smile as the cars around her whizzed past as she sped along the road. The windows were all rolled down her black jeans wrapped tightly around her legs and ass. A just as tight red tank top around her body and her brunette hair whipping wildly. Okay so she maybe she just got her license back yesterday but fuck it she was Raiffe Davies daughter. She wasn't spoiled she just lived by a motto that her father himself lived by. Rules are made to be broken. Fuck laws.

**  
I got this feeling in my veins this train is coming off the track  
I'll ask polite if the devil needs a ride  
Because the angel on my right ain't hanging out with me tonight**

She saw the Carlin's house and pulled the car up front sending Spencer a quick text. "here. cum." Smiling to herself at her little play on words because she knew the blonde knew very well what they were doing in her car tonight.

**  
I'm driving past your house while you were sneaking out  
I got the car door opened up so you can jump in on the run**

Within minutes Spencer running around the house having left from the back door the blonde girl sprinted across the yard into the open passenger door seat slamming it behind her giggling all the way. Spencer was in a white polo from Abercrombie was tight enough to show her flat stomach and black bra. Her mini skirt hugged her ass and her flip flops slapped the pavement loudly.

**  
Your mom don't know that you were missing  
She'd be pissed if she could see the parts of you that I've been kissing  
Screamin'**

Taking one last look at the Carlin's house Ashley spotted Paula staring at the television blankly. Her eyes drooping heavily from what must have been a long day at the hospital Ashley couldn't help but let a devilish smirk play across her face. Mrs. Carlin was never too fond of her precious perfect innocent little baby girl dating the drop out rebellious and as she referred to Ashley as "the spawn of Satan" girl. And that made these trips so much more pleasurable. Giving another evil smile to the girl sitting next to her leaning in she took those soft lips into her own nipping and licking secretly hoping Paula Carlin would look out the window. Finally Spencer pushed her lightly away giving one final smirk and cocking her eyebrow in the process the car sped off so fast it had left the curb by the time anyone could say "orgasm." ****

No, we're never gonna quit  
Ain't nothing wrong with it  
Just acting like we're animals  
No, no matter where we go  
'Cause everybody knows  
We're just a couple of animals

So come on baby, get in  
Get in, just get in  
Check out the trouble we're in

As Ashley drove past houses whizzing by the neighborhood she felt Spencer's hot breath on her neck. One thing Paula had to learn, her daughter wasn't as innocent as she thought. Seconds after the blonde's hot breath had touched her she felt Spencer's lips on her ear. Kissing, suckling. As she whispered words of just how long she had waited for this, how much she needed this, how hot she was for Ashley. It was almost unbearable to the brunette and only made her go even faster to their destination. Ashley could feel her arousal drench her underwear as the blonde moaned into her ear.****

You're beside me on the seat  
Got your hand between my knees

Ashley stiffened against her seat foot slamming down harder on the gas as she felt Spencer's hands at the top of her jeans.

"I want to feel you now." The blonde whispered huskily into her ears. Pushing her hands into the panting brunette's jeans.

**  
And you control how fast we go by just how hard you wanna squeeze**

The blonde's nimble fingers were quick to find the brunette's clit. Throwing her head back and gasping Ashley fought to keep her eyes open. Her knuckles whitening at the tight grip on the steering wheel as the blonde next to her began to make circles around the bundle of nerves. Finally squeezing them between her fingers Spencer felt the car lurch forward as Ashley pushed yet harder on the gas pedal of the car. Happy with the response Spencer squeezed the little nub between her fingers even harder giggling as the car lurched forward again. Ashley her head back into the headrest her eyes slamming close for a second before she forced them open and her grip on the wheel tightening.

**  
It's hard to steer when you're breathing in my ear  
But I got both hands on the wheel while you got both hands on my gears**

With the blonde breathing heavily into her ear Ashley could feel her hairs stand and goosebumps raise over her skin. Her nipples hardened at the feeling on the hot air Spencer's labored breaths blew at her ear. Holding the steering wheel as if clutching for her dear life Ashley forced herself to concentrate on the road. Turning the wheel at the right turns. Spencer now had her other hand moving slowly towards the brunette's center to join her other hand. Reaching the top of her pants this hand pulled down the unbuttoned jeans. The car swerved and the truck behind them honked vicously.

"Fuck. Spence."

"Shh. I want to taste you while you drive." She whispered sensually into the brunette's ear. Hearing her girlfriend's breathing hitch at this statement her head began to move lower towards Ashley's hot core.

**  
By now, no doubt that we were heading south  
I guess nobody ever taught her not to speak with a full mouth**

Ashley watched her eyes hooded her head moving from looking up at the road and back down to her girlfriend. The brunette shifted in her seat as the blonde continued to pull down her jeans. When the article of clothing was finally around Ashley's knees Spencer pushed her girlfriends legs further apart. Without a warning the blonde snaked her tongue out flicking over the hard clit.

"SHH—IIT" Ashley sputtered unable to keep her eyes open. The honking of the truck behind her made her slam them open to realize she had been driving lopsided.

"Keep driving." Spencer voice came out demanding.

"Keep licking." Ashley replied cheekily pushing the blonde closer towards where she needed her the most.

**  
'Cause this was it, like flicking on a switch  
It felt so good I almost drove into the ditch  
I'm screamin'**

The car continued to rumble onwards. Ashley obeyed and so did Spencer as she took let her tongue tease the nub endlessly. The brunette bit down on her lip in the frustration that she could not do anything else as she was driving. Spencer soon took the nub between her lips and sucked on it mercilessly. Ashley bit down even harder on her lips. She could taste the blood from it. Her eyes fluttered close for a second when they opened again Ashley swerved the car narrowly missing a ditch.

"shit…" she whispered quietly, not knowing whether the curse was directed at the ditch or at the pleasure.**  
**

**No, we're never gonna quit  
Ain't nothing wrong with it  
Just acting like we're animals  
No, no matter where we go  
'Cause everybody knows  
We're just a couple of animals**

So come on baby, get in  
Get in, just get in  
Check out the trouble we're in

Spencer came up for air not knowing why they had swerved.

"Did we hit something?" her breaths were coming quick almost like pants. Pants that matched Ashley's panting as she felt the pre-cum dripping from herself. She didn't know whether to think how absolutely hot this was or to worry about the leather in her car. Reaching down with one hand she ushered Spencer's head closer to her desire. Feeling the need to get to there's destination faster Ashley determinedly floored the gas, letting go of the blonde's hair she returned both hands to the wheel. She needed to fuck Spencer. Now. And Good.

**  
We were parked out by the tracks**

At the sound of gravel crunching against the heavy weight of the car, Spencer knew where they were without even having to look up. Rolling up all the windows that had let in all that air letting the two feel so much freedom and bliss. Ashley parked the black Porsche Cayenne in the dark corners of the train tracks.

**  
We're sitting in the back**

Holding Spencer under her chin Ashley urged the blonde to lift her head. Looking into those blue eyes she could spend hours lost in the brunette kicked off her shoes and pants. Launching herself at a very surprised Spencer somehow getting the two of them to tumble into the backseat giggling.

**  
And we just started getting busy**

Wasting no time at all for all that teasing Spencer had done during their ride over would do the blonde no favors tonight. Throwing the blonde harshly down against the soft leather seats Spencer let a soft "ommf" escape at the impact. But didn't let the sheer erotic effect of that escape her as a small moan followed.

"You were teasing me the whole way over here…while I was driving." The brunette taunted leaning down and trailing her tongue lightly on the blonde's neck. Spencer tilted her head up offering more of her neck to the brunette. Taking the skin just above the pulse point Ashley marked the blonde slowly as hers. Nipping at it lightly Ashley smiled as the blonde began to thrust her hips in her directions grinding against her leg. Ashley quickly pulled Spencer's top of, the blonde happily obliged lifting her arms above her head and throwing the shirt on the ground as the brunette made quick work of her bra. Lowering her head Ashley left a trail of wet kisses down into the valley between the blonde's breasts. Kissing back upwards towards the nipple Ashley took that harden nipple into her mouth, eliciting a gasp from the blonde.

"Ash. I-I need you now."

"You need me where?" the brunette whispered huskily at the blonde squirming beneath her she couldn't help but smile down at her evilly. The blonde had after all teased her mercilessly on the way over.

"Ash please." Spencer whined softly pushing the brunette's head lower to emphasize her point of where she needed Ashley. Pushing Spencer's skirt up so it bundled around her hip Ashley took off her girlfriend's thong slowly. Only to tease Spencer more, it had obviously worked because Spencer's legs started moving about attempting to get the offending piece of clothing off quicker. Feeling as if she had teased her girlfriend enough Ashley didn't wait to dive in. Her tongue quickly gathering the juice threatening to slide down towards the leather seats. Pulling Spencer's legs over her head and resting both on her shoulders she began to lap at the heavenly juice. Stopping every now and then to tease her clit producing more juice.

**  
When she whispered "what was that?"  
The wind, I think 'cause no one else knows where we are**

Her tongue now working over time as it flicked the blonde's clit rapidly her two fingers knuckle deep in the blonde Ashley made her strokes hard and fast.

"Oh fuck baby. I'm so close. Fuck…Fuck…Fuck me Ash." The blonde's pleading tone quickened the pace of Ashley's fingers.

Now switching between flicking and sucking the clit she felt the blonde's wall's spasm.

Then she heard Spencer stop panting. Her body jerked and her leg muscles stiffened. Looking up from her current position Spencer looked like she was trying to sense something.

"What was that?" she whispered quietly and panicked.

Making sure all the locks on the car were locked just in case what the blonde had heard was possible a creeper in the shadow of the train tracks.

"What was what babe?" the brunette too asked cautiously, if could have just been the wind rustling something out there. Who else would know where they had gone?

**  
And that was when she started screamin'  
"That's my dad outside the car!"**

Looking back up at the blonde Ashley saw her face contort in fear. Looking behind her out the window. And for a second Ashley really thought scary creeper man with hockey mask had shown up. Jerking her head towards the direction in which Spencer's face had turned white she saw something. Something much worst than the scary stories of insane men holding decapitated heads. Arthur Carlin standing outside the car seeing everything. His expression was what one could explain as priceless. Shocked that his baby girl was lying there under another girl completely naked and offering herself up so freely.

"SHIT THAT'S MY DAD OUTSIDE THE CAR!!!!!!"

"OH FUCK!"

Limbs flew everywhere as the two teenagers attempted to untangle from each other and Arthur Carlin stood outside motionless like a statue still too shocked to do anything else.

"Spencer?" he asked curiously as if expecting the two to be some other girls that looked far too much like his daughter and her girlfriend and start yelling at him for following them. But surely enough that was his daughter flailing about in attempt to dress herself, and that was Ashley looking like she just witnessed a death, and surely enough that was the black Porsche Cayenne that had come by to pick his daughter, who now had her shirt half way pulled on, for many dates.

**  
Oh please, the keys, they're not in the ignition  
Must have wound up on the floor while  
we were switching our positions**

Propelling herself into the front seat in Superman flying stance Ashley pulled herself into the driver's seat. She had to drive, drive now and save her girlfriend some dignity from her father who had now reeled back in horror that it really was his baby girl in the backseat of that car. Her hand felt blindly for the keys in the ignition but felt nothing.

"OH SHIT, WHERE THE FUCK ARE THE KEYS??!!" She screamed blindly. Quickly diving her head to where the pedals were hands feeling around. This may have been comical if only it were anyone else but Mr. C outside. Maybe Paula…

Hands still groping for anything she vaguely remembered her foot hitting something up here when she was pinning Spencer to the backseat. _Oh fuck. I knocked it out myself._

**  
I guess they knew that she was missing  
As I tried to tell her dad it was her mouth that I was kissing  
Screamin'**

As Ashley continued to grope the floor for any hard object Spencer had chose simply to cover her exposed self from her father with Ashley's shirt seeing as her girlfriend had her bra on already. Arthur now having recovered was now knocking madly on the windows and in the blind fear and panic that Spencer tried to propel herself to the front seat as well while remaining covered under Ashley's skimpy t-shirt pushing the open window button. As the window slowly rolled down they head what Mr. C had been shouting outside.

"-encer!! You get our of that car now. Do you hear me young lady!! Ashley!"

Ashley feebly tried to make an excuse, "sir we were just kissing sir." As her hand continued to grope for the key.

"Your mother went you your room to say good night Spencer. How dare you sneak out. No internet, no phone call, no-"

Ashley managed to push the button to close the window as her hands finally found the keys next to the brakes. **  
**

**No, we're never gonna quit  
Ain't nothing wrong with it  
Just acting like we're animals  
No, no matter where we go  
'Cause everybody knows  
We're just a couple of animals**

Sitting up so quickly Ashley got a head rush she quickly pushed the key into the ignition and the engine came roaring to life.

"SORRY MR. C!!!" she shouted loudly for Arthur Carlin to hear before she sped off the car shot forwards. Two girls looking absolutely horrified one in her bra only, and the other in her shirt only. Both looking straight ahead eyes wide open. There was no question that Spencer wouldn't go home. She couldn't face her dad. Not after what he had seen, and most definitely now her mother she would be given hell for having snuck out.****

So come on baby, get in  
We're just a couple of animals  
Get in, just get in  
Ain't nothing wrong with it  
Check out the trouble we're in  
Get in, just get in

"I am so going to hell." Spencer stated simply still looking ahead.

"I'll see you there babe." The still shocked Ashley continued to drive.

Ignoring the bleating noise of Spencer's phone as it continued to ring endlessly with, "Dad," flashing constantly on the screen.

"Sooo dead..." Spencer said mostly to herself staring blankly ahead.


	2. Lips of An Angel Hinder

_Honey why you calling me so late?_

Spencer swore to herself, who the fuck was calling her at 3 in the morning. Whoever this is better have a good excuse she was having an Ashley dream. Carefully untangling herself from the body next to her picking up her cell phone on the way the blonde stumbled out of the room. Grabbing her robe in the process and swinging it on. Silencing the ringing hoping she hadn't awaken the figure lying in the bed. She looked down her eyes squinting still from sleep. But her frown slowly smoothed out into a smile when she saw who the caller was.

Flipping the phone she held it close to her ear and curled up in the arm chair in the living room smiling like a gossipy girl.

"Hey Ash. What's up. It's 3 in the morning!!"

She giggled and smiled happily when hearing the angelic voice.

"Sorry babe did I wake you?"

_  
It's kinda hard to talk right now._

"Yeah but it's okay," Spencer whispered quietly peeking into the bedroom. "Good thing Jonica's a heavy sleeper."

She couldn't help but smile to herself at the light growl she heard on the other end at the mention of the name of her current girlfriend.

_  
Honey why are you crying? Is everything okay?_

"Yeah, real great." Spencer could sense the sarcasm. A part of her knew that Ashley wished she would tell Jonica about them. But she couldn't bear to simply hand her heart over to the brunette again. It hurt too much when she broke it. It was then that Spencer realized Ashley's tone. After so many midnight calls she knew Ashley's talks. The way her voice sounded when she smiled, before she giggled, when she was angry, resentful, and worse the way her voice trembled when Ashley was crying.

"Baby what's wrong?" Spencer couldn't help as her voice came out louder than she expected.

_  
I gotta whisper 'cause I can't be too loud_

Slapping herself lightly on the forehead for her carelessness Spencer peeked again. She saw Jonica squirm a little in her sleep. Throw her arm over at where Spencer's side and feel the empty space. Holding her breath she watched the short haired girl frown but fall back asleep.__

Well, my girl's in the next room  
Sometimes I wish she was you  
I guess we never really moved on

"Nothing Spence. Nothing. I'm fine." She could hear Ashley's resistance to the tears in her tone. "How are you love?"

Spencer smiled lightly and stared at her legs. She hated these times. When she knew Ashley was hurting and she couldn't be there to hold her.

"I'm fine I guess. Jonica just realized I'm not in bed. I think she thinks I went to the bathroom."

Spencer looked down at herself again. Ashley used to jolt up in bed when she so much as slipped out of their embrace. She wanted to tell Ashley, tell her everything. That she still loved her. That she wished sometimes it was Ashley sleeping beside her in bed. Instead she simply said, "I wish you were here. I don't think I ever got over you Ash." The last part was whispered. Meant for her ears only but she heard Ashley's breathing hitch a little.

"I don't think I did either Spence. I miss you."

A comfortable silence settled for a few minutes. Spencer could spend hours simply listening to the brunette breathing.

_  
It's really good to hear your voice saying my name  
It sounds so sweet  
Coming from the lips of an angel  
Hearing those words it makes me weak_

The two woman couldn't help but smile to themselves thinking about how wonder it was to be able to say each other's names. Hear it from the other's lips. Spencer could say it and not have a fight with Jonica. Ashley could say it without people telling her to get over it.

The two thinking the same things as they both remembered how soft it was to kiss each other. To be close to each other.

Ashley felt her knees buckle beneath her and she sank down on the couch behind her.__

And I never wanna say goodbye  
But girl you make it hard to be faithful  
With the lips of an angel

Watching Jonica reach over again patting the still empty spot Spencer panicked a little. Praying to all lesbian idols that her girlfriend would keep sleeping. She didn't want to hang up. She wanted to stay up all night listening to Ashley's voice. Spencer never though she would be one to cheat. But she couldn't help it. Who could turn their back on a woman like Ashley?__

It's funny that you're calling me tonight  
And, yes, I've dreamt of you too

Suddenly the brunette started giggling. Not knowing what she's found so funny but the blonde couldn't help but laugh along with her.

"What?" Spencer asked biting her lip to keep her giggles muffled.

"Nothing it's just so weird. I was having a dream about you and I woke up 'cause Aiden started squishing me and now I'm talking to you. I don't know. You were speaking in a helium cartoony voice in the dream."

Spencer's smile had faltered at the mention of Aiden's name. The same way she could hear Ashley's smile fall at the mention of Jonica.

"Yeah I was dreaming out you too…in a non helium voice way." Spencer tried to keep the conversation light but just as she knew Ashley's tones. The brunette knew hers.

_  
And does he know you're talking to me  
Will it start a fight  
No I don't think she has a clue_

Realizing her mistake Ashley backtracked now wishing she hadn't said his name.

"He doesn't know I'm talking to you." Ashley said, assuring the blonde.

"No… I know that." Spencer nodded to herself in the dark room holding back her tears now remembering that there was someone that could hold Ashley when she was sad. It just wasn't her.

"Spence you know he would understand, he knows that we're still friends. Besides he sleeps like the dead."__

Well my girl's in the next room  
Sometimes I wish she was you  
I guess we never really moved on

"How's yours doing?"

Spence smiled lightly. It was weird but at times she and Ashley referred to Jonica and Aiden as, "yours." It's almost as if they were side-stepping the words "girlfriend," and "boyfriend."

She looked once again. Jonica had finally taken that Spencer had been out of bed far too long and finally gotten up and was now throwing a large t-shirt over her naked frame. And it made Spencer sick what she had done a few hours ago with her.

_  
It's really good to hear your voice saying my name  
It sounds so sweet  
Coming from the lips of an angel  
Hearing those words it makes me weak_

"Spencer?" Ashley quarried. The blonde had been silent for a while.

"Yeah?" Spencer's voice told the brunette her blonde was close to tears.

"What's wrong Spencer?"

"I miss you Ashley. I can't do this. I can't be with her and think about you constantly."

Spencer hyperventilated for a while her voice still as quiet as she could keep it for now Jonica was looking in the bedroom bathroom calling out to her.__

And I never wanna say goodbye  
But girl you make it hard to be faithful  
With the lips of an angel

Know would have been a great time to hang up and turn on the television and play it off that she couldn't sleep. But still not finding the strength to hang up Spencer fearfully muttered, "she's looking for me."__

It's really good to hear your voice saying my name  
It sounds so sweet  
Coming from the lips of an angel  
Hearing those words it makes me weak

"Spencer hang up." Ashley's voice was calm, it wasn't commanding. A simple statement. Almost as if it were a test.

"Spencer?" Ashley asked once again after a long silence.

"I don't want to." Spencer sounded like a lost child.__

And I never wanna say goodbye  
But girl you make it hard to be faithful  
With the lips of an angel  


"Spencer." Ashley's voice was urgent. She wanted to be with Spencer. But she couldn't force Spencer. And a part of her wanted to know Spencer's choice. So as terrible as it was she was going to see what happened. Spencer could either hang up on her or tell Jonica.

_And I never wanna say goodbye  
But girl you make it hard to be faithful  
With the lips of an angel_

"Spencer?" Jonica poked her head into the living room. Spotting the dark figure of her girlfriend on the couch she smiled. "There you are. I was beginning to worry."

"I'm right here." Spencer's voice was barely audible.__

Honey why you calling me so late?

"I love you."

Ashley heard. Then what came next broke her heart.

"I'll talk to you later Chels." Then she hung up.

She stared blankly at her phone. Not hanging it up yet. Her tears silently rolling down her face in the darkness of the room she heaved, shuddering as she silently sobbed.

The dial tone droned on loudly in the silence of the room. Encasing the room in it's monotonous tone. It was like a heart flat line and Ashley felt as if her heart had indeed stopped beating. For it had been beating before simply for one reason the hope of Spencer. But now that too had left her.

Spencer had chosen.


	3. The Way I Loved You Taylor Swift

_He is sensible and so incredible_

I couldn't help but smile as he swung me in his arms. His laugh was so pure and sweet and I hated the fact that I didn't love him the way he loved me. I hated the fact that I didn't smile the way I did when I was with her.

"Aiden! Put me down!" I flailed my legs as he spun me around.

"Alright! Alright!"

Gently he lowered me to the ground.

_And all my single friends are jealous_

He was the perfect guy. He really was. I knew people were jealous of me for having him. Madison always told me, "Girl you definitely traded up from her. Look at him, those are good abs on a boy as sweet as he is."

And I always felt so guilty. He was the perfect guy, but as cliche as it sounds. He wasn't the perfect guy for me. Hell I didn't even want a guy.

_He says everything I need to hear and it's like_

_I couldn't ask for anything better_

He pulled me against his body and I felt myself collide into his hard body. I missed the softness of Ashley's body. His abs hurt her when he collided into her, Ashley's never did that.

_He opens up my door and I get into his car_

His car pulls up in the driveway and as I'm running down the pathway I see him get out of the driver's seat and pull open the passenger seat. Smiling shyly I scooted into the comfortable leather seat of his Nissan. He closed the door and I watched as he jogged his way around to his side. Yet all I could think about was how much I missed Ashley picking me up in her Porsche.

_And he says, you look beautiful tonight_

_And I feel perfectly fine_

Slipping into his seat he leaned over to kiss me, turning away I offered my cheek to him.

"You look beautiful tonight Spence." He smiled to me and I smiled back as he started the car. I could smell his after shave and in a way it comforted me but at the same time made me miss Ashley all the more. As he rolled out of my driveway my mind began to wonder back.

_But I've been screamin' and fightin'_

(flashback)

I stumbled down the stairs of her mansion and flung my arm to get her to let go.

"Spencer baby I'm sorry. You know I didn't mean it like that."

"Well then why say it at all?" I yelled back as I continued to storm through her living room. Once again wrenching my wrist free from her grip I grabbed my purse from the counter top and stormed out the door into the pouring rain.

_And kissin' in the rain_

As the rain pounded at my body I felt her grab me by the hips again and spin me around. Pushing my body against her Porsche her lips crashed into mine in a passionate kiss. Our lips moved in a passionate rhythm, molding our bodies closer and closer. Her hands went from tangled in my hair to pulling at my drenched top.

_And it's two a.m. and I'm cursin' your name_

"Fuck Ash." I moaned, I could feel myself getting wet in more than one way.

_You're so in love that you act insane_

Her lips travelled down to my neck where I felt her begin to mark me and I grinded my hips into hers getting the message of what I wanted across to her.

_And that's the way I loved you_

"I Love You Spencer." She declared before biting down on the sensitive spot on my neck making my whole body buck into hers.

_Breakin' down and comin' undone_

The rain fell down on her face masking her hair to her, making her white tank top see through. She pulled my shirt over my head, her nails were quick to scrape at my stomach.

_It's a roller-coaster kinda rush_

I felt the familiar lurch in my stomach as her hands traced unknown patterns across my torso. Moving up my sides, across my shoulders, they tickled at my collar bones and I watched her eyes darken in lust as she lowered them towards my chest.

_And I never knew I could feel that much_

_And that's the way I loved you_

Her hands moved across my bra, my nipples were quick to respond as they stood erect behind the material. But not long after that she had discarded that next to my shirt on the floor. The rain was pounding at my bare skin and I never felt anything better than this. As her touches burned through me the rain cooled me down.

"I Love You Ashley."

_He respects my space and never makes me wait_

_And he calls exactly when he says he will_

"You okay Spence?" Aiden's voice brings be back to the present. I smile and nod to him because I don't trust my voice. He simply nods deciding not to push her any further.

_He's close to my mother_

My mind wonders again but to Aiden. My mother is so happy. She had gotten around to the idea that she couldn't seperate me and Ashley. But when she saw Aiden. God, she practically fell in love with him. He's the perfect boy she always wanted me to date.

_Talks business with my father_

And my dad loved him. Aiden taught my dad how to make his Grandma Dennison's world famous turkey soup. They bonded over everything. From basketball teams, to colleges that were good, to the perfect way to bake a cake.

_He's charming and endearing, and I'm comfortable_

I looked over to him again and again have that nagging feeling of guilt well up inside me. He was the perfect boyfriend and all I could think about was my ex-girlfriend. Reaching over I took his hand that wasn't on the steering wheel in mine. When he looked at me I smiled and squeezed his hand a little. Smiling back at me her looked back up and continued to drive. I could see how happy he was me, simply holding his hands and it increased my guilt by tenfolds.

_But I've been screamin' and fightin'_

I closed my eyes and again my mind travelled back to Ashley.

Her hands moved to my revealed breasts, her lips were set on mine again as she flicked my nipples in her hands.

_And kissin' in the rain_

I felt her tongue sweep at my bottom lip and I was more than willing to grant her permission. And our tongue's duelled passionately. I felt the water droplets slip down my body. I felt the drops from our faces pool together.

_And it's two a.m. and I'm cursin' your name_

She dropped her head and began leaving a trail of kisses towards my breasts. I threw my head back and let out a loud moan. "Oh fuck Ash!" I screamed into the cold night air. I arched my back Had it not been rainig the neighbors would have definitely heard us by now.

_You're so in love that you act insane_

_And that's the way I loved you_

I felt her take my cold nippple into her mouth. The contrast from how cold the air was and how hot her mouth was make me shiver in pleasure. Her tongue flicked at my nipple inside her mouth as her other hand rolled my other nipple between her fingers. I pulled at her hair urging her impossibly closer to me.

_Breakin' down and comin' undone_

My breath hitched as I felt her other hand inch downwards, her mouth swithed to give the other nipple equal attention.

_It's a roller-coaster kinda rush_

I gasped as her fingers glided along my wet stomach and I desperately grasped at the hem of her shirt.

_And I never knew I could feel that much_

_And that's the way I loved you_

Pulling her shirt over her head she broke our contact to let me pull it off. Our lips collided again and her hands settled and began to work on the button on my wet jeans.

_He can't see the smile I'm fakin'_

I looked at Aiden again he was still driving silently, stealing a few glances at me. I was majorly spacing out. He looked over again with a worried expression and I faked a smile to let him know I was fine.

_And my heart's not breakin'_

I didn't love him. Not the way he loved me. And as much as I wanted to feel heart broken over the fact that I couldn't be with the perfect guy. It hurt me that life would be so much easier if I could be with him.

_'Cause I'm not feelin' anything at all_

He stopped at a red light and turned to me squeezing my hands. I turned to him my head to him and he leaned in to kiss me. And I let him. His lips weren't as soft as her's were. He left a quick peck and I felt nothing. There was no spark, there was no love. There wasn't anything. The light switched to green and he turned his attention to the road and continued to drive. I looked down at my lap and let Ashley take over my mind again.

_And you were wild and crazy_

I remember when she used to sneak into my house to see me at night. She had found a way to climb up to my window. And a few times my mom almost caught the two of us in bed. The first time Dad caught us she was spooning me and we were sleeping. He didn't tell me he knew until the next morning.

_Just so frustrating, intoxicating, complicated_

It always frustrated me. Ashley always hurt me even when she never meant to. And I forgave her too easily but she is the hardest person to be mad at.

_Got away by some mistake and now_

I don't even remember how we split up. We had a big fight and Aiden came along. He was everything I wished for in a boyfriend. And when Ashley saw the two of us she just lost it. My mind travels again back to the fight we had in the rain.

_I'll be screamin' and fightin'_

My hips jerked to the movement on her hands as she undid the button on my jeans. Her breath was hot against my face. I bit my lip as her hand slipped into my jeans.

_And kissin' in the rain_

She teases at center running her fingers delicately along the folds as she leans in to kiss me again. She pushes me down on the hood of the car and it's hard to stay on from how slippery it is but she holds me in place.

_It's two a.m. and I'm cursin' your name_

"Fuck Ashley I need you inside of me." She loved it when I begged. And beg I did, with that she slammed two fingers into me making me squeal in pleasure. The rain continued to pound at our skin.

_I'm so in love that I acted insane_

_And that's the way I loved you_

My body slides down the car but she uses that as a way to fuck me harder, pushing my slick body up the hood of th car and letting me fall back down hard on her fingers.

"More baby I need more of you in me." I demanded loudly. No one heard us the rain was pounding so hard on the side walk. She easily slipped a third finger in me and I could feel myself stretching.

"Oh fuck." I grabbed onto her digging my nails into her bare back. She still had my whole body falling down on her hands. Her thumb brushed lightly against my clit making my hips buck into her almost throwing her off the car. She could tell I was close because her thumb was making rapid circles around my clit, tapping it occasionally in random patterns.

_Breakin' down and comin' undone_

"Come for me Spencer." Her husky voice filled my ears.

She dragged her fingers across my g-spot and I let it all go. Screaming into the night air.

"ASSHLEEEYYY!!!" She continued to pump into me drawing out my orgasm as I fell limp on top of her car.

_It's a roller-coaster kinda rush_

I could feel her kisses along my neck, my cheeks, across my eye lids. She covered me with kisses as I recovered from the orgasm.

_And I never knew I could feel that much_

_And that's the way I loved you_

I opened my eyes looking into hers we searched in each other's eyes. We simply lay there on her car in the pouring rain swimming in each other. It wasn't until half an hour later when we were both shivering that she wrapped me in her arms and carried me back into the empty mansion. She made me a bubble bath and we lay in each other's arms. Later on that night we fell asleep our naked bodies entangled.

_And that's the way I loved you_

The car jerked to a stop and I realized he had parked outside a fancy restaurant. I was beginning to feel empty all this thinking about Ashley had be depressed and I wanted nothing to do with Aiden right now. He ran over to my side to open the door for me again offering his hand and I took it.

_I never knew I could feel that much_

We entered the restaurant and he approached the waiter, "Dennison, table for 2, 7 o'clock.

"Ahh yes. Mr. Dennison right this way please."

Allowing me to go first I smiled politely, as soon as he wasn't looking at my face I let the comfortable blank expression take over once again.

We were brought to a table, and there she was. Just next to us. It looked like she was on a date but she too had a blank expression upon her face.

_And that's the way I loved you_

As if she sensed my presence she looked up from her glass of water. I saw the joy flash across her face before confusion and sadness took over. It was then that my hand burned in Aiden's and I snatched it away as if he had hurt me.

Her date continued to talk to her but she looked at me and cocked her head giving me a questioning glance.

I looked at Aiden where he watched confused as we held out a seat for me to sit in. And back to Ashley her date had finally followed where she was looking and was now staring at me in disgust.

"Spencer why don't you sit down." Aiden was still confused, I had yet to tell him that the beautiful brunette sitting there was my ex-girl friend.

I sat down in the seat he offered and continued to steal glances at Ashley, I saw her excuse hereslf to the bathroom. I wanted to follow but her date was giving me the stink eye and Aiden took my hand in his and started talking. I had to force myself to listen to him and nod along.

"...and you're a really special girl Spencer. I've never felt this way about anyone before."

My heart broke a little more.

The waiter came back and handed us our menus, at the same time that I saw Ashley return to her table.

Opening mine I gasped at what I found inside.

There, written unmistakably in Ashley's handwriting was:

"Here's a little something I wrote for you:

I'll be screamin' and fightin'

And kissin' in the rain

It's two a.m. and I'm cursin' your name

I'm so in love that I acted insane

And that's the way I loved you

Breakin' down and comin' undone

It's a roller-coaster kinda rush

And I never knew I could feel that much

And that's the way I loved you

I'm so sorry Spencer. I Love you.

Leave with me please?"

I looked up but she was no longer in her seat she was right next to me.

"What do you say Spence?"

It felt so good to hear Ashley say her name again.

"Umm, who are you?" Aiden questioned from behind Ashley unsure as to who this woman was crashing his date with Spencer.

"I'm so sorry Aiden. You're the perfect guy, the perfect boyfriend. But I Love Ashley." Spencer stumbled to her feet. She walked over and kissed Aiden on his cheek.

"You're going to make some girl the happiest girl ever Aiden Dennison."

And with that she took Ashley's outstretched hand.


	4. How Long by Hinder

**Why'd you go and break what's already broken**

Ashley crept into their penthouse quietly she and Spencer had been fighting so much recently about how they never spent any time together anymore due to Ashley's busy work schedule. Spencer told her she felt like Ashley cared more about the bands and musicians she signed than their relationship. She had decided the band could fend for themselves for a few nights on their tour and had caught an early flight back, hoping to surprise the blonde. Maybe patch up their dying relationship before it was too late.

******I try to take a breath but I'm already choking**

She left her bags by the door, she could make all the noise she wanted some other time, it was after all already 1AM and she never really knew if Spencer wanted to stay up or not. Creeping quietly across the marbled floors she did a little dance inside as every silent footstep brought her closer to her oh so beautiful fiancé. She would probably just snuggle right up in bed and spoon with Spencer. Try not to wake the blonde and come morning she'll make Spencer breakfast in bed. Pushing the bedroom door open the brunette's eyes adjusted to the darkness. An unfamiliar smell that didn't feel like home hit her nostrils. It made her brows furrow, because if anything it smelled like cologne. As if her senses heightened her eyes suddenly saw everything so clearly. It made her smile fall and shatter. Her stomach dropped so heavily she thought she might throw up. And she could swear she both felt and heard her heart stop beating. In bed, on her side was a man snuggled up to Spencer. The way she had planned on doing so just seconds ago. His face buried in her beautiful blonde locks, smelling her hair that Ashley had longed to run her fingers through. His arms wrapped around her holding her to him.

******How long till this goes away**

Stumbling back the brunette knocked over a pencil cup, the noise shattered the silence awakening both lovers. Panicking the brunette turned and ran grabbing her purse and her shoes she left the penthouse fleeing towards her car. Back in the penthouse Spencer jumped to the sound dazed, confused, and quite frightened by it she shook the man lying next to her.

"Aiden!" no response, "AIDEN!" her whispers harsher. He finally woke up with a grunt.

"Wha-mm" He asked trying to snuggle back into the pillow.

"I heard something and I don't remember if I locked the door. Go check!"

Sighing he got up picked up his discarded boxers and pulled them on before venturing into the dark house. He looked left and right noticing the spilled stationary. And then his eyes settled on the abandoned suitcases by the door.

"Hey Spence?" He called out as the blonde emerged the room wearing his large dress shirt.

"What? Who was it?"

"Well it was the pencils. But whose bags are those?" He jerked his fingers towards the mysterious luggage. Noticing how his girlfriend's face paled at the sight.

"Oh Shit… oh no no no no. Fuck. Damn it!" Her eyes brimmed with tears and he frowned.

"What the hell is going on?"

"Fuck! I'm engaged Aiden. I'm engaged." She surrendered to the guilt and let it all loose. "Those are her bags."

"HER? Wait, Spence, you-you're engaged? Where the hell is your ring?" His eyebrows jumped up in confusion.

"Okay when I met you Ashley and I just fought, and I got pissed. Took off my ring, and…then well, we happened."

Aiden's looked around. Ashley…penthouse…he looked around at the walls of CDs, the wall mounted with several guitars, then noticed for the first time the picture of Raiffe Davies and an attractive brunette smiling.

"You're engaged to Ashley fucking Davies?" His voice stunned.

Spencer nodded as she ran her fingers through her hair frustrated with herself.

"Okay Aiden, you need to leave. And I need-I-I need. Fuck I have to go find Ashley."

Aiden nodded slowly and returned to the bedroom getting dressed as her pulled on his jeans, Spencer took off his shirt and pulled on her robe. It had a "Mrs. Carlin Davies" embroidery design on it. And she felt more naked wearing the robe than when she had taken off Aiden's shirt.

Aiden silently finished dressing and turned to grab his bag. Not knowing what to say to the woman he thought he could someday love who had turned out to be married to a big time music producer which happened to be a woman as well. He simply turned nodded awkwardly at the blonde and left.

Spencer's head hung shamefully on her frame. _All alone. Again._

******I try to remember to forget you****  
****But I break down every time I do**

Ashley's Porsche made a small rumbling noise as she pushed on even harder on the accelerator. She tried to clear her mind of the image of a man with his arm wrapped around the woman she loved. But every time she tried all she got in return were images of what they were doing previous to their falling asleep in each other's arms. Tears filled in her eyes as she tried hard to bite them down. But she could feel them coming, from the tightening in her throat, to the tickle in her eyes, to the feel of a small droplet of water, one of many making its way down her cheek. She drove blindly and stopped the car looking around she almost smiled at where she had automatically driven to. Almost, smiling seemed too painful a thing to do right now. She got out of her car locking its doors and began to make her way down the sandy paths to the beach.

******It's left me less than zero****  
****Beat down and bruised**

She didn't stop walking until she reached the water, she watched as it licked at the sand. Some waves got higher than other did. She sat down where the sand was dry, but close to where the sea had seemed to reach its furthest. The wet sand showed evidence that the see had washed over it many a times. Leaving down with a shaking finger she traced a capital letter, 'A', and a capital letter, 'S', into the sand. She drew heart around the two and sat staring at the sea. Over the next few minutes the sea had slowly lapped at the letters in the sand. Slowly destroying the etchings and left just the wet flat earth in front of the depressed brunette. _All it took was some time and we were bound die._ She bitterly thought as her mind continued to torture her with pictures of her fiancé in the throes of pleasure as a man held onto her body.

******I can't see him with you****  
****Why'd you go and break what's already broken**

The picture seemed impossible to her. Spencer? Cheat on her? And with a man? It was impossible and yet she had seen it with her very eyes. Her brain went into denial. There had to be another reason for two people to be holding each other that intimately in bed, naked… She tried harder than ever to come up with a reason. But all her brain could come up with was, her beautiful Spencer had cheated on her. She had finally broken their already cracked relationship.

******I try to take a breath but I'm already choking****  
****Cause everywhere I look I can see how you hold him**

The brunette inhaled sharply taking in the smell of midnight wind in Los Angeles and the sea. The sand. It used to be so comforting and now all it did was remind her of the times she and Spencer had spent here. But she didn't know where else to go. She could go to Kyla's place but she wanted to be more in control of herself before she went sobbing to her sister. The only person that had really seen her lose control of her emotions was Spencer. But she couldn't go crying to the blonde about this. She frowned as she thought about how his arms were wrapped around the blonde's torso. How Spencer cradled his arm like a child to her chest. Their fingers were interlaced. And Spencer had looked so…peaceful.

******How long till this goes away**

Angrily swiping at the tears she could only think on one way to make the pain leave her. One way that would numb her so fast that pain would mean nothing. She hated to admit it, but mass amounts of alcohol was the answer. Getting to her feet she angrily kicked sand towards the sea. _That's for making us disappear. _Silly of her to blame it on the sea, but at the time she needed to blame it on someone. And she could not for the life of her blame Spencer.

****

**I can't seem to get my heart over you****  
****Cause you creep into everything I do**

Ashley drove to her favorite bar, she knew Sean would understand. Sure he knew when to stop serving alcohol but given the circumstances and the fact that they were old friends. He'd probably happily let her slip with a few extra drinks. With on hand on the steering wheel she looked at the empty passenger seat, at the middle where the glove compartment rest. Where she and Spencer used to rest their intertwined hands as she drove. She remember looking over and seeing the blonde's smiling face, the wind whipping her hair back. As time passed Ashley blamed everything possible. She went from the sea, to the universe, to God, to her worklife, her band, herself, the man. Everyone and everything was put to blame. Every little thing but Spencer.

******And now I'm dying to know****  
****How he touches you**

She looked down at her watch. Her eyes were beginning to swell from the tears. It was almost 3. Sean would be a pal and keep it open for her. She hopped out of the car and walked in slowly. Business was slow but then again it was almost closing time. She made her way to the door. _Wonderful that was a full half a minute of not thinking about how some douchebag asshole is fucking your fiancé. _Images flashed across her face again, in this one the man lying next to Spencer was smiling cockily at Ashley in her head.

"Hey Ash!" Sean frowned noticing that it was not a time to be happy. "Whoa, woman you look like shit."

Ashley allowed the smallest, and meekest of smiles to flash on her face.

"Sean do me a favor, leave me alone with your alcohol. I'll close up."

Sean knew what it meant, it had happened when Ashley's father died, and again when her first successfully signed band fell apart. It meant he gave Ashley the spare key and let her do her mourning her own way. Taking off his bartending apron he took the key from its hook on the wall. Approaching the broken brunette he kissed her on the head and hugged her to him. It took all of Ashley's will and strength not to break down into sobs in his arms.

"You come talk to me when you're ready 'kay Ash?" His soft voice comforted her.

"Okay." She said like an innocent child.

Smiling he turned off all but a few lights by the bar, and locked up the shop from the outside.

******I can't see him with you****  
****Why'd you go and break what's already broken**

Ashley looked around. _Alone._ She thought a bitterly and approached the shelves. Stroking the bottles as if the touch itself soothed her broken heart. She grabbed the whiskey and took a swig from the bottle. The burning sensation gave her some happiness. For hours now she had felt nothing but depression and desperation. To feel something. It was good. Approaching the piano in the bar she touched the soft wood. Sean had a pianist play every few nights. And had amateur hours sometimes. She sat down in the chair and felt at the familiar white and black keys. They molded into her fingers as if returning home. Funny she thought frowning, going back to Spencer always felt like going home…here she sat in a deserted bar with nothing but her whiskey and the piano and she felt comfortable. A tune began to play into the sad lonely room that only hours ago was filled with happy chatter. The music coiled its way into hard to reach places. Between cracks in the walls, wrapping itself around the chairs and tables. It coated the room in the sad tint of blue.

Spencer swore a few more times fumbling through her closet she threw one sweatpants, a t-shirt and a hoodie. She didn't know what she was going to say to Ashley. She knew she was madly in love with Ashley at some point. But she also knew that over time they had fallen out of love. And she had started seeing Aiden and there was excitement there. There was passion. More than anything she knew she didn't want to lose Ashley Davies. She knew of three places Ashley would have gone. The beach where Spencer first admitted to the musician that she was gay. Sean's bar where Ashley had gone after her dad's death and the fall out of her first band. And Kyla's. She grabbed her phone and the keys to her Honda Fit. With that leaving the house, and in the dark the suitcases still sat by the door. And the pencils were still strewn across the ground.

******I try to take a breath but I'm already choking****  
****Cause everywhere I look I can see how you hold him**

Ashley played through her whole song her eyes closed feeling each key as she touched it. In her mind she was playing the song to her beautiful blonde. In her mind Spencer had been seated right next to her smiling. In her head after she finished the blonde had leaned in for a quick kiss. But as she opened her eyes she was reminded of her loneliness. Of the semi-dark, cozy, and yet so empty bar she sat in. And the most painful memory that stabbed at her brain was the image of Spencer wrapped in someone else's embrace. Of Spencer snuggled comfortable into someone else's body.

The blonde's Honda Fit raced down the road, it was abandoned at this time in the morning. The car screeched to a halt as she ran from the car to the beach. She searched as far as she could see. From under the dock where she had told Ashley to the spot in which they had happily tanned. But all that remained of the brunette's presence had been washed away by the sea. Spencer looked at the rising tides, her own tears falling fast. A feeble word escaped her lips, it was more whispered than said as she was too scared to trust her own voice, "Ashley." But the wind came and whipped the words from her lip, carrying it into the dark sky.

Ducking her head Spencer retreated to her car. She would go to Sean's bar. Ashley had to be there. Please God let her be there.

******How long till this goes away****  
****How long till this goes away**

Ashley took another swig from the whiskey bottle. She had now gone through a good half of the bottle and was beginning to feel more than the burn. In fact if anything the whiskey was igniting the flame of hatred once more. Only this time it turned on the one person Ashley had yet to blame. "Spencer Carlin Davies my ass." She mumbled stumbling from the piano seat where she had sat for so long staring into space and drinking. She made her way to the bar where she found her second bottle of whiskey. She would pay Sean back tomorrow. The anger boiled, and the heat was overbearing. Ashley wanted to know so many things. She wanted to know why Spencer had cheated. She wanted to know who the fuck it was with. She wanted to know how many times. And for fuck sakes she wanted to know how long it would take for her heart to beat regularly again. Her phone rang and she looked at the caller ID. It flashed Spencer. Shaking her drunken head she yelled back at her ringing phone. "NO! I DON'T WANT TO TALK TO YOU!"

Spencer sighed in defeat and acceptance when she got Ashley's voicemail. She sounded so happy in her recorded message. Pushing down on the gas pedal harder she raced towards the bar. She pulled up in the parking lot of the familiar bar. She was both relieved and nervous to see the black Porsche sitting in the parking lot. She got out of her car and walk cautiously towards the bar as if it were a sleeping beast. As she approached the glass door her heart broke. There sitting on the barstool was her fiancé. She had forgotten how beautiful Ashley was, they spent so much time apart. The beautiful face was dejected. Broken. Empty.

******She said she wants to be friends****  
****I took a big step back**

Ashley took another large gulp of the alcohol, a figure by the front door shifted. She busied herself with finding a cup with ice since the second bottle was significantly warmer than the first.

"SORRY WE'RE CLOSED!" She drunkenly yelled her head still ducked behind the bar counted.

"ASH! PLEASE."

The voice froze Ashley. Her head hung limply, _I hate that I'm so predictable sometimes._ She got her ice and a large cup filling it with whiskey.

Spencer hated the silence. "Ashley I'm sorry! Please can we just, can we start over?"

Still silence Ashley still hidden behind the bar counter chugging down her whiskey as if it would help her heart from breaking every time she heard Spencer's desperate pleas.

"Please can we start over? We can start from back when we were friends!"

As if this idea were to make Ashley feel better. It did quite it opposite. The brunette stood up showing herself from behind the bar. Her cup refilled a good few times.

"Friends?" she inquired dangerously that made Spencer stop dead and fear she had said the wrong thing.

"I come home, find you in bed after fucking another man." There was a pause as if to let them settle in. And they did, every one of those words stung Spencer like a slap to the face.

"And all you have to say to me is let's be fucking friends?" Ashley's anger boiled over, they spoke through a glass door but it was as if Spencer could feel Ashley's waves of anger rolling towards her.

******She said****  
****She said****  
****She said she's sorry**

Spencer winced at the words, but Ashley was too far gone to care. She was too drunk to notice, too angry to care, and too depressed to realize.

"I'm Sorry Ashley! I'm Sorry." Spencer could only utter these words desperately. Tears rolled down her face and soaked into her blonde hair. But Ashley too had tears spilling from her brown eyes. Both were unsure whether they were angry tears or sad tears. But Ashley made the decision for them. She did not want to break down in front of Spencer. Anger it was.

******With one finger****  
****I said fuck that**

"Fuck you Spence." Her hand mocked Spencer held up as it flipped her off. Spencer was shocked, Ashley had never spoken so crassly to her.

"Ash-" the blonde was speechless. What was she supposed to say? Ashley had never been this rude to her before.

"I said FUCK YOU Spencer Carlin. Get the fuck out of my face."

There was a second for Spencer to mourn the fact that Ashley hadn't called her Spencer Carlin Davies, and then she registered the next sentenct.

"Ashley I don't want-"

"GOOOOO! GOD DAMN IT SPENCER JUST GET OUT OF MY FACE! GO! FOR FUCK SAKE'S GET THE FUCK OUR OF HERE!"

With tears streaming down her face of how harsh the brunette could be towards her Spencer backed away in disbelief. Her face contorted in pain as she sobbed. She whispered, "I'm sorry." One last time before she turned and fled.****

**I can tell you're lying when your lips move****  
****Cause of one lie it's not me it's you**

Ashley still sobbing in the empty bar gripped at her phone desperately. She dialed the number and within seconds came the annoyed voice of her sister.

"What Ash?" A sleepy voice asked.

"Ky…could…you…please" she stopped to try to control her breathing as her cries still ran through her body.

Kyla Wood Davies was up within seconds, Ashley never cried like this.

"Ashley honey what's wrong?"

The care in her sister's voice made it harder than ever for Ashley to speak. "pick…me up…at…" She sniffed again, "Sean's bar."

Kyla sprung out of bed grabbed a hoodie her car keys and left the house quickly.

"I'll be right there hun."

Dial tone.

******It's left me less than zero****  
****Beat down and bruised**

Ashley thought back to Spencer. She's not sorry. She looked so peaceful, so rested, so…happy in his arms. Besides why would she be sorry that last time the blonde and brunette had had a face to face conversation Spencer had told her to marry her job. And go fuck herself. Yeah she certainly sounded sorry then. The brunette clutched onto her cup tightly as she refilled it again taking for sips as the cold liquid burned her insides.

******I can't see him with you****  
****Why'd you go and break what's already broken**

There was frantic knocking at the door and as Ashley turned around to either tell off kids looking for trouble, or tell Spencer to leave again, she saw her worried sister standing at the door. Walking forwards she unlocked the door allowing Kyla in. The younger Davies slipped in quietly and locked the door behind her. Her sister had a cup of whiskey clutched to her like a life raft, and by the looks of it, she had had more than enough for tonight.

"Ashley. What's wrong?" Kyla tried not to sound alarming, her voice calm and level.

******I try to take a breath but I'm already choking****  
****Cause everywhere I look I can see how you hold him**

With a few strangled attempts to speak, Ashley finally came up with, "They were in our bed." And she couldn't bear to bring herself to anymore than that. But it was enough for Kyla to understand. She frowned, _how could Spencer. How could she ever?_ But instead of wording out her thoughts she hugged the her sister close to her. Ashley finally let it all go. Everything she had tried to hold in. All the tears she had tried so hard to control. She collapsed sobbing into her sister's shoulders. And the two fell to the floor wrapped in each other's caring embrace as Kyla gently rocked her sister. It broke her heart to see Ashley like this, she was such a strong person.

Spencer was crying as she drove home. She had nowhere else to go. And all she could do now was return to the scene of the crime. She frowned as the words replayed in her head. Ashley had never spoken like that to her. She had never acted like that in front of her. And it scared Spencer, it scared her so much she wanted to run from the brunette. Where was the loving girl she had fallen in love with all those years ago? The one that snuck into her house just so they could spend the night holding hands? The one that bought her a teddy bear after she got stitches? The one that wrote her the most beautiful songs dedicated to her and her alone? In that moment she hadn't seen a trace of the Ashley she had known and it scared her to the very core.

******How long till this goes away****  
****Why'd you go and break what's already broken****  
****I try to take a breath but I'm already choking**

Kyla cradled the crying Ashley for the longest time, Kyla too was crying. She was crying because Ashley was crying. She was sad because her sister was sad. In between her sobs Ashley had managed to tell Kyla of what she and Spencer fighting over for the past month. What she had planned on doing, and what she had instead walked in on. The thing that happened at the beach. Spencer's desperate attempts to explain and her refusal to hear them. There in the empty bar room, for the first time Ashley opened up fully to Kyla. Letting Kyla see her at her most vulnerable moments.

As for Spencer she had arrived home. Numbly picked up the fallen pencils. She changed into her pajamas. Her face blank, feeling nothing. She was simple shocked, her world was emotionless, passionless without her brunette in it. She looked around the house for something to do, perhaps for fallen pencil cups. But only found Ashley's luggage and feared touching them. She returned to bed and hugged Ashley's pillow to her chest but it smelled of Aiden. And it made her sick. She ran to the bathroom hands clutching her stomach and emptied the contents of her stomach into the toilet bowl. Rinsing out her mouth she shuffled to the closet where she grabbed a random hoodie of Ashley's. Holding it to herself as she curled up on the bed once more, the comforting scent of the brunette hit her nostrils. And she half smiled, have sighed, and her heart broke a little more.

******Cause everywhere I look I can see how you hold him****  
****How long till this goes away****  
****How long till this goes away**

After what seemed like hours Ashley's tear ducts had exhausted themselves and all that was left were uneven breaths, and her tearstained face. Kyla still rocked her, and they remained seated on the floor for another few minutes before Kyla suggested that she drive Ashley back to her place. Where Ashley could stay the night with her. She looked down but it appeared that the brunette had gone catatonic. Her eyes were blank and she barely realized what she was doing.

Kyla asked again to make sure, "Ash, honey, do you want to come home with me?"

On the drive back Kyla snuck looks over at her sister's still catatonic state, the tears had stopped, but she kind of preferred the tears, it showed that something was going on beneath the surface. Asking the musician if she was okay, only led to another silent nod that meant nothing. Finally giving up Kyla allowed Ashley to be lost in her head. She feared what Ashley was thinking, what the brunette was torturing herself with.

They got back and Kyla changed Ashley into a pair of boxers and a large t-shirt. Before laying the girl down in bed. Still in a catatonic stage, the younger of the two sisters leaned down and kissed Ashley on the forehead. She looked into the empty expression once more and whispered a, "let me know if you need me." Before she retreated back to her room. But as the night progressed not once did Ashley seek Kyla out for anything. And neither did her eyes shut, nor did either lovers, both Ashley and Spencer get any sleep.****

**She said she wants to be friends****  
****I took a big step back**

The next morning Spencer paced through the house waiting for a decent hour to go to Kyla's house. She had to try. She couldn't give up on them. She messed things up and she was going to fix them. She looked at her watch, 7. _I should probably wait until 8. _Her shuffling continued. She had spent the night walking back and forth from the closet. Once one sweater started to lose its Ashley smell she had returned to another and yet another. Everything was clear to her. How she had let herself let go of such a thing she'll never know. Her feelings, the memories, all the times she and Ashley had spent together came rushing towards her like a splash of cold water last night. How could she have been so stupid as to do such a thing?

******She said****  
****She said****  
****She said she's sorry**

It was 8 in the morning and Kyla had been up since 6. She hadn't had the best sleep she had faded in and out of sleep. Worrying about Ashley. She got up and walked to the guestroom. The lump of Ashley's form was still under the blankets. _Well it's good she slept, she must be exhausted._ The doorbell rang and as Kyla turned to answer it the same haunted empty voice form last night called out from the lump under the blanket.

"I'll get it."

"Ash! I thought you were sleeping."

"Couldn't sleep."

With that the ghost like figure of Ashley Davies walked by Kyla and descended the stairs. Not much surprise flashed across her face when she was met with the blonde.

"Ashley." Her voice was pleading Ashley not to shut the door yet. Ashley obeyed and stood there features still blank. Both had eye bags from a night of not sleeping. \

"Ash. I am. So. So. So. Sorry. I don't know what I was thinking. It was stupid."

The blonde noticed the lack of emotion, or activity of the brunette face and took a different course.

"I-I had a lot of time to think last night Ash. I miss us. I miss the old us. The us that would skip class together for a day at the beach. The us that used to sit up in my room painting our fingernails. The us that went on that crazy roadtrip."

A small twitch of emotion ran across Ashley's face, but not enough to set a fire, just a small spark was all.

"Please Ashley." The tears started rolling down the blonde's cheek again. "Please give me another chance?" She pleaded.

******With one finger****  
****With one finger****  
****I said fuck that**

Ashley looked as stone cold as ever in that moment. It made Spencer shiver in fear. Her face hadn't changed much, it was still the catatonic look that she had worn since last night. But yet it seemed so full of hate.

"Kyla will be over for my things." She said her voice almost monotonous. Spencer hung her head shamefully in defeat tears making marks on the concrete of Kyla's front steps. Ashley held up her hand once more. "Fuck you."


	5. Shy That Way by Tristan Prettyman

_A/N: Hey guys I am so sorry I've been gone for so long. My laptop has been in and out of repair. And second year of college is proving to be a pain in the ass. But I got this idea in my head. And I absolutely HAD to write it. I finished it in a few hours so it may not be that great. But I hope you like it. I promise I will get back on the Deal as soon as I can._

**You know your stunning****  
****Absolutely stunning****  
****And I'm running always running****  
**

It had started when Spencer had to go to the coffee shop closer to her place. The first time she ever entered she ordered her coffee and saw the most beautiful woman she had ever laid eyes on before. Ashley herself was hurriedly waiting for her coffee. Picking it up from the counter she turned and saw a beautiful Goddess of a blonde looking her way. The blonde ducked her head down immediately embarrassed she had been caught staring. Ashley began walking towards the door she was going to be late if she didn't hurry. As she passed by the blonde looked up and Ashley smiled at her before she kept walking. Spencer smiled back, blushing slightly at the way the brunette had looked at her.

"Spencer?" The woman behind the counter called holding up her coffee to go. Reaching for it she thanked the lady and walked out. She would most definitely be returning to this coffee store.

******And now I'm crying****  
****You know only cause I'm caring**

Ashley berated herself as she drove away to her meeting. Why hadn't she stopped to talk to the beautiful blonde who was looking at her? Why was it that all she did was goofily smile at her? Why didn't she ask for her number? Say hello? Ask how she was doing? She would go back tomorrow. She prayed the blonde would be there again. She went to the meeting and didn't absorb much. All she could think about was this blonde. Her smile, the way her eyes sparkled, the cute way she looked down when she was caught staring. She thought of what she could say to the blonde, but even in her mind she was stuttering , fumbling over her words.

Spencer sat in her office pretending to read the file that was just put on her desk. She had even put on her glasses to add to the act. In reality she was thinking about the brunette. The way she smiled at her, the power she felt between them when they made eye contact. Why didn't she say hi to her? Maybe wave? The thought of speaking to the brunette however already made the blonde nervous.

******And if you were more daring maybe you'd stop staring****  
****And come over and talk to me**

Ashley left her house a little earlier this morning. She entered the coffee shop and for the first time had her coffee "for here." She sat down by a table where she got a good view of the front door and the line and sipped at her coffee.

Spencer parked her car and locked the door as she walked into the coffee shop she noticed the brunette was there already. She was sitting at a table, and when she realized Spencer saw her looking she ducked her head into her newspaper. The blonde tried to hold back the smile of just how cute that was. She ordered her coffee and sat at a table a few feet away with her files spread out in front of her. Occasionally she felt the brunette's eyes burn into her. Other times she would look up to find the brunette working on the crossword puzzles in the newspaper.

Day One.

******And tell me about how you've been waiting patiently****  
****And how you tried but I just turned away****  
****And I'll say, "yeah well you know, I'm shy that way"**

The coffee shop music played on as they sat at their individual tables sneaking peeks at each other. Wondering whether to other had returned to the coffee shop for the same reason they had. Did she want to see me? Or maybe she just really likes their coffee.

Spencer peeled off a post it note from the pad and stuck it on the budget proposal she was reading. She wrote down a side note on it and continued to review it. Looking up she saw the brunette hastily duck her head down again.

Ashley started working on the Sudoku's in the morning paper and looked up to find the blonde watching her. She fumbled with her post its and frowned as she jerked her head back down to her papers. Smiling she silently cheered for herself. Maybe she stood a chance with this beautiful woman.

Day two.****

**Shy that way****  
****Shy that way****  
****Maybe I'm shy that way**

As time went on both realized they had to be going soon. Neither wanted to move, but surely enough Spencer's assistant called to warn her that the big boss man was not in a good mood today. Gathering her things Spencer stood from her table. The brunette was looking up at her, she smiled shyly and began to walk out. The brunette smiled back just as shyly before the blonde turned hesitantly. Ashley couldn't help but watch her. That there. She thought, that there is the girl I'm going to fall for.****

**You know she's stunning****  
****She's absolutely stunning****  
****But she's always running****  
****But I'll catch up to her...**

Ashley checked her watch and swore to herself. Standing up she walked over to the counter to the lady standing behind it.

"Hey Marsha?"

"Yeah honey?"

Ashley had been a customer for some time now.

"That blonde…do you know her?"

"Ordered the same thing as last time. Says her name's Spencer."

"Spencer." Ashley smiled at the way the name rolled off her lips. "Thanks Marsha. Have a good one."

"You too Ash."

Ashley was too caught up in her own world to reply.****

**The way she keeps her distance****  
****Keepin my interest****  
****So I'll keep it consistent**

As she drove to work Ashley thought of the blonde walking way. She thought to herself. The way Spencer walked away. Ashley didn't remember the last time a woman had captivated her so. The last time a woman had made her speechless. Two days and she hadn't been able to utter a word to Spencer.

Spencer entered the office grumpy, it had been a pretty good morning. Seeing the brunette first thing in the morning was definitely a way to put a smile on her face. Pulling her away from that to listen to her boss yell at everyone and anyone was not. She sighed heavily and thought of the brunette smiling up at her as she walked away.

Day Three.****

**Maybe someday, someway, somehow, sometime****  
****We'll get together and we'll break it down**

The next morning Ashley was at the coffee shop as soon as it opened. Carrying two paper cups back to her table yesterday she placed one on the table the blonde had sat at yesterday. She grabbed a sharpie from her purse and wrote, "Good Morning Spencer," on the cup. Sat down with her puzzle page from the newspaper and waited.

The door's rang as the bell over it rang signing the entering of a customer. Ashley looked up from her puzzles. She smiled radiantly at the blonde who looked back and smiled at her. Spencer noticed the coffee and cocked her head in confusion. Ashley noting how cute the blonde was confused gestured silently to the cup and watched as the blonde raised her eyebrows, smiled and walked toward the table. Sitting down she read the message on the cup. A look of confusion on her face for a second as to how the brunette knew her name. She pulled out her files and post it's again.

**And I'll ask, "why you gotta be so shy, why you gotta be that way?"****  
****Well maybe, baby, I like it that way**

They smiled at being in each other's presence as they both set out to work again. About 5 minutes in Spencer scribbled on a post it note and stuck it firmly on Ashley's table. Leaving the post it note pad on the brunette's table.

"How did you know my name?"

Ashley read and smiled. She grabbed the post its and wrote in her sharpie.

"I know Marsha. Hi. I'm Ashley."

She stuck the post it back on Spencer's table. They smiled at each other again.

They both resumed to their work. Ashley looked up again. Grabbing the post it notes she wrote legibly. She stuck the note on Spencer's table and watched as the other women giggled and blushed. Spencer grabbed the post it pad and wrote something in response that made Ashley smile.

They spent the morning exchanging notes until they had to leave for work.

They gathered their post it notes and both spent the rest of the day reading over them and giggling and smiling to themselves. Over. And over again.

Day Four.

******Shy that way****  
****Maybe I, like it shy that way****  
****Maybe I love you so shy that way**

It was Spencer who arrived earlier today. She figured it was her turn to buy the coffee. Asking Marsha what Ashley usually got she sat down at their usual tables, she wrote on Ashley's cup, "Thanks for the coffee yesterday."

Ashley arrived and was surprised to see a waiting blonde and a coffee cup. Sitting down she pulled out her newspaper and her post it notes. They smiled mischievously at each other.

And so it began. They scribbled on, using post it after post it. Too shy to talk.

"Do you want to know something?" Ashley stuck her post it note on top of her last one.

Spencer smiled, she looked over and nodded to the brunette.****

**Ok, I'm shy that way...**

The next post it was ready by the time Spencer had nodded. Ashley reached over and stuck to firmly on the table right on top of the paper Spencer was reading. Her hands moved back revealing the words.

"You're beautiful."

Day Five.****

**There's always too much talking****  
****And I wanna just keep walking**

It was a routine for both women now. They picked up their briefcases, slip on their shoes, and grab a pad of post its heading off to the coffee shop early in the morning. They sat next to each other silently communication. They laughed loudly at what was written at times. Spencer sometimes jokingly pushed Ashley for things Ashley had written down to tease her. They sometimes spent minutes staring at each other smiling. Never saying a word.

It was now on a regular basis that Ashley told the blonde she was beautiful.

A post it note from Spencer was put across the brunette's Sudoku.

"Can we hold hands?"

Ashley smiled at how adorable the blonde was. Looking up she saw the blonde nervously holding out her hand. Smiling she joined their hands. They both beamed at how wonderful it was for them to merely hold hands. They kept their fingers interlocked for the next half an hour. Ashley would scrawl messily with her left hand as they kept the post it notes coming.

The first post it note put on Spencer's table: "Your hands are soft."

The second post it note following it immediately: "It's nice. =)"

Spencer giggled at the brunette.

Marsha smiled at the two of them serenely from behind the counter.

Day Six.

******And I keep staring, baby, keep staring****  
****Though I may not know the right things to say****  
****I'll get it out to you one day**

They arrived as usual Spencer was buying today. They now raced each other to the coffee shop, a little game they played. Spencer barely got work done in the morning anymore, she didn't' really care. As for Ashley she didn't even bother bringing the newspaper now. As long as she had an extra post it note pad on her. The first thing they did was write a "Good Morning beautiful" note to each other. Then they linked hands. Ashley scrawled with her left had once more.

"Thumb war?"

She smiled childishly at Spencer. The blonde giggled and nodded and they began to duel.

At times they had to write a few consecutive post it notes to tell each other things, but it didn't matter to them. Ashley had the upper hand in there thumb war at some point, but it seemed like Spencer was holding back. The second Ashley thought she was bound to win the blonde unleashed her powers and won the match. Ashley pouted childishly.

"IT'S NOT FAIR" She scribbled down and showed the post it note to Spencer. The blond giggled and grabbed her pen.

"Hey! I won! Fair and square!"

They giggled together. They checked their watches. The time had come again. Every morning the dreaded time would come for them to go their separate ways to work. They wouldn't see each other again until tomorrow morning. They smiled sadly at each other writing out their sad goodbyes.

"I'll be thinking about you all day." Ashley placed her post it note in front of the blonde.

Spencer read it and smiled. Giving Ashley an endearing look as she put on her jacket. She pulled out her post its. "I will too." And drew a little heart next to her words.

Ashley watched as Spencer walked out the door. She smiled to herself at how lucky she was to have met Spencer. Thinking about the past few days Ashley grabbed her post it note and wrote down something. She ran out the door into the parking lot.

"SPENCER WAIT!" It was the first time she was spoken to Spencer. The blonde turned around shocked.

Ashley ran up to her and presented her with a single post it note.

"Can I kiss you?"

So there they were two women in the parking lot of a coffee shop sharing the love they had nurtured. They held tightly to each other as if they were frightened that gravity would pull them apart. A close mouthed kiss, but a sweet sweet one. They memorized this moment as it was etched into their minds. The way they felt upon each others lips. The way their hands grasped onto one another. In that moment, two girls who had shared nothing but slips of paper were the only two people in the world.

Day Seven.****


	6. Girl at the Rock Show by Blink182

_Hanging out behind the club  
on the weekend.  
Acting stupid, getting drunk with  
my best friends. _

I couldn't stop giggling as we barreled down the alleyway turning sharply at the end. The three of us breathing heavily leaning against the walls covered with graffiti. Madison slapped Sasha playfully on the arm, "you're such a slut."

Sasha was still hugging the beer she had just gotten some random guy to buy for her. Through what she liked to call the art of seduction. In other words, yes, she slutted her way to the beers.

Pulling one out Sasha lightly tossed it at Madison.

"But you love me for the slut I am Mads."

I couldn't help but giggle along with them as I opened mine and took a large gulp, it helped to slow down my breathing.

_I couldn't wait for the summer and  
the Warped Tour. _

There was a moment of silence as I watched my two best friends drink from their cans. The excitement bubbled inside me that within a few hours we'd be at the concert. And a few more weeks school was over.

_I remember it's the first time that I saw  
her there.  
_

Looking up I saw them. I don't know why we didn't notice them on our way in. But they were staring at us. The girl. I knew who she was. Anyone that lived within these parts of L.A. and went to schools near this area knew exactly who she was. Ashley Davies. She was standing there holding a cigarette in one hand and her beer in the other staring at us. Taking a long drag from the cigarette in her hand she blew the puff of smoke our way. Finally seeing what she looked like I started to understand the reputation she had.

_She's getting kicked out of school  
'cause she's failing _

I had heard she got kicked out of King High School a year before I came and now she was as Westcott. Ashley Davies. She was the girl that everyone wanted. Guys and girls, and she got who she wanted. Hell I heard she sleeps with teachers if that's what she wants. And there's something about her that no one could resist. People practically considered themselves lucky to have been with her. My eye caught hers as I scanned the three of them. It sent a tingling feeling down my spine. Her eyes were basically burning right through me. I knew it right then if she wanted me she had me. I turned to see Madison and Sasha it seemed she had the same effect on anyone even my two straight friends. We strolled over to them.

_I'm kind of nervous, cause I think all her friends hate me._

I couldn't help but feel maybe her two friends looked unhappy that she struck up a conversation with me almost immediately. Maybe they didn't think I was good enough for her. I avoided making eye contact with any of them.

"Ashley Davies." She placed her beer bottle in the other hand with the cigarette and raised her empty hand. Shaking her hands I couldn't help but realize how soft her skin was.

"This is Aiden and Sean."

Her two friends nodded in my direction.

_She's the one, she'll always be there  
She took my hand and I made it  
I swear. _

"You guys waiting to for the concert?"

I nodded. Then realizing I still had yet to speak and she probably thought I was retarded.

But my mind was still buzzing from the fact that I felt something. It was like a jolt, a spark, when I touched her hand. Even if it was just for a short hand shake.

"You guys wanna sit with us?" She smiled at me and I almost died right there.

God, I had to get a grip of myself. I wasn't that girl. I wasn't the girl that swooned.

"Sure." My voice came out colder than I expected in my attempt to show I wasn't about to fall for her that easily. Everyone knew Ashley Davies got the V.I.P. box for concerts. She was after all the daughter of Raiffe Davies legendary guitarist of Purple Venom. I saw that Madison and Sasha, they too seemed unhappy that she was staring at me. Even though she had directed the question to the three of us she never took her eyes off of me and I could feel myself melting right in front of them.

"Uhm. Yeah. Sure. That-uhm-that sounds nice." My God I sound like a retard.

I expected her to frown look me up and down again before turning away while realizing how positively uncool I was. But instead she chuckled. That sound. Her chuckle, it was like listening to molten gold. It was so rich, so deep, and I think I just got a bit wet. Reaching down she took my hand.

"Come on then."

I may have passed out for a few seconds before I fully registered it. ASHLEY DAVIES IS HOLDING MY HAND. OH MY GOD. OKAY…CHILL SPENCER. CALM DOWN. BREATHE BREATHE. STOP SWEATING DAMN IT! Suddenly it felt as though every thing I did was wrong the way I walked, the way I stared at a random object to avoid staring at her ass, even the way I breathed.

_Because I fell in love with the girl  
at the rock show  
She said 'what?'  
and I told her that I  
didn't know _

My head snapped back up to stare at her. She turned around noticing I hadn't trailed after her just yet. My God she was beautiful. Her eyes were a beautiful rich brown. Her lips so full so pink. Her skin that of a greek Goddess', a cute button nose, she was amazing.

"What?"

I'm staring….I'm staring and drooling like a village idiot. Snapping my jaws shut I stumbled over my words. "I-I don't know." I looked back down letting my hair fall over my blushing cheeks.

She pulls me into the concert where we stood side by side. Jumping and screaming the lyrics until I think my lung burst. I couldn't help but notice how our arms rubbed frequently. I couldn't help but stare at her when she had her eyes closed when she let the song swallow her. I couldn't help but notice how angelic her voice was when the band sang their slow songs. I couldn't help but fall in love with Ashley Davies.

_She's so cool  
Gonna sneak in  
through her window ._

When the concert ended I wished it could have gone on forever. I wished I could have stood there next to Ashley Davies, swallowed by my favorite songs forever. But surely enough it ended. She of course had some crazy party to get to by in a couple hours. She asked for my number and I practically threw myself onto her with the speed the numbers left my mouth. She saved it into her phone lifting up the small device and taking a photo of me. She leaned in so close I wanted to turn my head and capture her lips.

"I'll call you." Her husky voice washed over me.

She left a soft kiss on my cheek as her friends pulled her away.

The next few days were the longest more torturous days of my life. I waited faithfully by my phone as if we were already dating. I came up with ridiculous excuses as you why she wouldn't call. Maybe she didn't like the way my cheek tasted when she kissed me. I tried to recall whether I smelled funny that day. But Ashley Davies was never one to do the expected. Imagine my surprise when one Tuesday night a stunning brunette was throwing pebbles at my window from our backyard.

_Everything's better when she's around  
Can't wait 'til her parents go  
out of town.  
I fell in love with the girl at the  
rock show._

I told her I had school tomorrow. She said, "so do I." I tried a new approach, I had a test to study for. Her response? "I've got a paper and a presentation. Come on."

I couldn't help but smile.

"Let's go to the beach!" She seemed so excited I almost gave in.

"It's 10PM!"

"So?"

That was Ashley Davies catchphrase I guess. "So?" She said it so freely, as if nothing could ever touch her. She was invincible in her own way.

"Fine." I dramatically huffed out as if I were being forced to do something I really didn't want to. But inside I was jumping up and down frantically. _ SHE WANTS TO SPEND TIME AT THE BEACH WITH ME AT NIGHT! SHE WANTS TO HANGOUT WITH ME ALONE. SHE WANTS TO BE ALONE WITH ME, SPENCER CARLIN! I'M GOING TO HANG OUT ALONE WITH ASHLEY DAVIES! _ She smiled knowingly at me, she knew just how excited I was inside.

"Meet you out back beautiful."

I smiled, _she thinks I'm puurrtyful. _I giggled like a foolish girl. Grabbing a light hoodie to protect me from the cold L.A. night air I tiptoed quietly through the house. Glen was talking on the phone with his latest slut, having phone sex no doubt. I'm just glad he and Madison at least had sex before he became STD infested. Even she won't admit it ever happened. Clay as usual was studying. I may not want to go out on a Tuesday night, but I was nothing like Clay. My dad was reading over his latest cases, and mom was close to passing out in front of the television. The pros of having a parent who's a doctor, they are simply far too tired to really care by the end of the day. We spent the night walking along the beach, the salty air of the sea, she held my hand and I was scared I would get nervous and my hands would get all sweaty. But while she put my brain into overdrive, she could also soothe me with the smallest of looks, a light touch. We talked and I learned so much about Ashley Davies. She wasn't afraid to let me know she was hurt in the past, but at the same time I could see she was putting on a strong face to cover up her vulnerability. She told me about broken hearts like it was nothing, she spoke of her mom's neglect like she could ignore such a thing. By the end of the night was certain I was the only person who knew the true Ashley Davies. _Stupid Spencer, she probably pulls this routine with every love sick girl she's got._ Those next few weeks were absolutely magical. She was always by King High ready to pick me up by the end of the day in her infamous Porsche, I began to wonder if she ever went to school or maybe she got let out early. We spent more nights at the beach. She took me home where I found out her mom's neglect was no lie at all and she showed me her DVD collection, her game consoles and we battled dangerously. Finally one night again on the beach as I told her about how we welcomed Clay to the family and my life in Ohio she stopped me under a pier. I was beginning to get used to the spell she had over me when she surprised me again. She leaned in and my heart fluttered as she pressed her soft lips against mine. It was perfection. There was nothing but those lips, and the waves. My mind seemed to go numb and empty and she pulled away reluctantly. I was dizzy and looked at her with absolutely no words to describe what I felt. She looked almost nervous and I saw a side of Ashley Davies no one did. I smiled lightly and hopes that it would convey what I felt for the kiss. We linked hands and continued out walk in silence. The waves were still there. They had watched I kiss and it was like they were applauding us for the most beautiful moment they had ever witnessed.__

When we said we were gonna  
move to Vegas  
I remember the look her mother gave us  
Seventeen without a purpose or direction  
We don't owe anyone a fuckin'  
explanation 

It was one of those days where after school she had come as usual, Madison and Sasha were used to this by now. Madison had jokingly told me she was glad she wouldn't have to drive my ass home anymore and Sasha said she'd get shotgun every time now. I got in the car and she drove of smiling happily.

"Where to?"

I remember asking her and she drove us back to her mansion again. We had yet another epic battle on her xbox and when we had exhausted ourselves we were lounging in her entertainment room when she suggested we should go to Vegas.

"We're not even 21. Everything we could do in Vegas is illegal for minors."

"Everything cool is."

She simply said like that was the winning argument.

Her mom walked in, "Ashley I'm leaving for the week. There's money on your nightstand."

"Cool we'll use it to go to Vegas."

Ashley had an unreadable face whenever her mom showed up. Something took over her face and I could never tell what it was, there was no reading the emotion in her face or her voice.

"Sure have fun." Her mom replied dryly turning to leave the room.

"You too Christine!" Ashley called back, her voice was mocking but her face showed no emotion whatsoever.

_I fell in love with the girl at the rock show  
She said 'what?'  
and I told her that I  
didn't know  
She's so cool  
Gonna sneak in  
through her window  
Everything's better when she's around  
can't wait 'til her parents go out of town  
I fell in love with the girl at the rock show  
_

She turned and saw me studying her face and her emotionless face melted away.

"What?"

"I don't know." I said quietly still pondering.

She seemed to slip effortlessly back into the conversation we were having before and I watched as she talked animatedly about all the things we could do in Vegas. Of course things only Raiffe Davies' daughter could do.

She drove me home that night, it was after all a school night and as exhausted as my mom may be about shifts at the hospital she definitely notices when one of her children don't come home.

By the time I was ready for bed I wanted to see her again. She was like a drug to me and I couldn't stay away for too long. I snuck back out and after 17 years in my life I had never snuck out so much until after I met Ashley. She was in a way a drug. Unhealthy for my school life, addictive, and I would get withdrawal symptoms without her. Glen was on his way to his usual troubles and in exchange for me not telling mom he had used his last allowance to buy doxycycline when he got chlamydia he would drive me to Ashley's place. Having absolutely no idea on how to climb through a mansion window I tossed pebbles at her window until I saw her light switch on. She appeared at the window in her white wife beater confused but at the sight of me broke into a huge smile. My heart fluttered again. She let me in and spent the night dancing. She was showing me some amazing songs she had written and we danced to her recorded song Dirty Mind she admitted she had written thinking about me. Holding her so close to me I was certain he could hear my heart pounding away. I admitted the first time I met Ashley Davies that if she wanted me she could have me. She got me that night. Laying me down sweetly on her bed at 2 in the morning after we had shared the most intimate moments of my life dancing to songs that were unheard by any other person but her she touched me in ways I was certain no one could ever. She ignited a fire within me and kept it lit with her light fleeting touches and kisses. She made my world spin and kept me grounded as I help onto her for dear life and we shared pieces of each other we had never shared with anyone else ever before.

_Black and white picture of her on my wall  
I waited for her call  
She always kept me waiting  
And if I ever got another chance  
I'd still ask her to dance  
Because she kept me waiting _

The next day we were up bright and early and she drove me to school where she gave the a sweet kiss and promised to call me soon. I spent the day in an absolute daze and blushed and fumbled over my words when Madison and Sasha asked what I had done last night. The love stuck girl I had promised never to become I had become. She texted me during science to tell me she had to go help her mom out of a sticky situation with a sad smiley and that she wouldn't be able to come pick me up from school. While I texted back that it was fine my heart fell. Had I done something wrong? Was I not good last night? Had she wined and dined me all this time just to get what she wanted? Was she done wit me? Absolutely miserable I caught I ride with Madison and turned down her and Sasha's offer to hang out. I stared at the photo of Ashley on my wall. I had taken in of her at the beach one night and in the dark of the night it looked black and white. I had asked her about her mother and taken the photo in hopes that if I stared at it long enough I would understand what that expression was. The more I looked however the more my heart cried out. I waited by my phone hoping that she would call. I barely ate at dinner and played off to my parents that I was feeling alright before going back up to my room where I continued to stare at the photo. Finally at ten she called. My heart leapt, this was what it felt like to be elated. I had gotten a hit of my drug and my smile was uncontainable.

"Hey Spence I'm so sorry, you are not going to believe what I just had to do for Christine. Crazy bitch gets arrested for public urination while she's drunk off her ass. You think you can get by the parents to come over tonight? I've missed you all day."

Yes, I would be able to go over for sure. Whether my parents wanted it or not, I needed my hit. I was going through withdrawal.__

I fell in love with the girl at the rock show  
She said 'what?'  
and I told her that I  
didn't know  
She's so cool  
Gonna sneak in  
through her window  
Everything's better when she's around  
can't wait 'til her parents go out of town  
I fell in love with the girl at the rock show 

(Ashley P.O.V.)

The next day I woke up to find the most beautiful blonde asleep at my side. I almost didn't wake her up just so I could stare at her for longer, feel that pleasant warm sensation in my stomach and bones that I get whenever she's around. But I knew if I let her miss school I would have hell to pay. So gently I woke her up with kisses, kisses that reminded me of the passionate night we had shared. Finally her eyelids fluttered open to reveal to me amazing blue eyes.

"Hey. You have school today." I smiled down at her. She smiled and rubbed her face into the pillow before looking at me.

"So do you."

I smirked, "yeah but I don't have go."

I dropped her off as King High regretting that I got kicked out, if I hadn't I would be able to hold her hand through those hallways. She kissed me and I promised again to pick her up after school. I arrived late as usual to school and found Aiden and Sean smoking by the bikesheds.

"Hey fellas," I greeted them with a smile.

"Well I'll be damned, Aiden owes me five bucks, he thought you weren't going to show." Sean said smiling at Aiden slyly.

"Have some faith!" I quipped at the tall brunette who was reluctantly handing over his money.

"Have another night with Spence?" He asked smiling at me. He knew this had to be special. I rarely ever spent more than a week with someone.

"You know guys, I think I'm really falling in love with her."_  
_


End file.
